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Gaslighting is the manipulation of someone into questioning their perception of reality. The term derives from the 1944 film Gaslight and became popular in the mid-2010s.
Some mental health experts have expressed concern that the term has been used too broadly. In 2022, The Washington Post described it as an example of therapy speak, arguing it had become a buzzword improperly used to describe ordinary disagreements.
The gerund form gaslighting does not appear in the play or films. It was first used in the 1950s, particularly in the episode of The Burns and Allen Show. In The New York Times, it was first used in a 1995 column by Maureen Dowd. According to the American Psychological Association in 2021, gaslighting "once referred to manipulation so extreme as to induce mental illness or to justify commitment of the gaslighted person to a psychiatric institution". It remained obscure — The New York Times used it only nine times in the following 20 years — until the 2010s, when it seeped into the English lexicon. Merriam-Webster defines gaslighting as "psychological manipulation" to make someone question their "perception of reality" leading to "dependence on the perpetrator". The American Dialect Society named gaslight the most useful new word of 2016. Oxford University Press named it a runner-up in its list of the most popular new words of 2018.
Gaslighting is different from genuine relationship disagreement, which is both common and important in relationships. Gaslighting is distinct in that:
In 1977, at a time when published literature on gaslighting was still sparse, Lund and Gardiner published a case report on an elderly woman who was repeatedly involuntarily committed for alleged psychosis, by staffers of her retirement home, but whose symptoms always disappeared shortly after admittance without any treatment. After investigation, it was discovered that her 'paranoia' had been the result of gaslighting by staffers of the retirement home, who knew the woman had suffered from paranoid psychosis 15 years prior.
The research paper, "Gaslighting: A Marital Syndrome", includes clinical observations of the impact on wives after their reactions were mislabeled by their husbands and male therapists. Other experts have noted values and techniques of therapists can be harmful as well as helpful to clients (or indirectly to other people in a client's life). Basseches coined the term "theoretical abuse" as a parallel to "sexual abuse" in psychotherapy.
In his 1996 book, Gaslighting, the Double Whammy, Interrogation and Other Methods of Covert Control in Psychotherapy and Analysis, Theo L. Dorpat recommends non-directive and Egalitarianism attitudes and methods on the part of clinicians, and "treating patients as active collaborators and equal partners". He writes, "Therapists may contribute to the victim's distress through mislabeling the victim's reactions.... The gaslighting behaviors of the spouse provide a recipe for the so-called 'nervous breakdown' for some victims, suicide in some of the worst situations." Dorpat also cautions clinicians about the unintentional abuse of patients when using interrogation and other methods of covert control in Psychotherapy and Analysis, as these methods can subtly coerce patients rather than respect and genuinely help them.
This increased global awareness of the dangers of gaslighting has not been met with enthusiasm by all psychologists, some of whom have issued warnings that overuse of the term could weaken its meaning and minimize the serious health effects of such abuse.
Some mental health experts have expressed concern that the broader use of the term is diluting its usefulness and may make it more difficult to identify the specific type of abuse described in the original definition. According to a 2022 Washington Post report, it had become a "trendy buzzword" frequently improperly used to describe ordinary disagreements, rather than those situations that align with the word's historical definition.
In the 2008 book State of Confusion: Political Manipulation and the Assault on the American Mind, the authors contend that the prevalence of gaslighting in American politics began with the age of modern communications:
The term has been used to describe the behavior of politicians and media personalities on both the left and the right sides of the political spectrum. Some examples include:
In self-help and amateur psychology
Gaslighting is a term used in self-help and amateur psychology to describe a dynamic that can occur in personal relationships (romantic or parental) and in workplace relationships. Gaslighting involves two parties: the "gaslighter", who persistently puts forth a false narrative in order to manipulate, and the "gaslighted", who struggles to maintain their individual autonomy. Gaslighting is typically effective only when there is an unequal power dynamic or when the gaslighted has shown respect to the gaslighter.
The term gaslighting is more often used to refer to a pattern of behavior over a long duration, not a one-off instance of persuasion, but the method(s) of persuasion is the defining trait of gaslighting behavior. Over time, the listening partner may exhibit symptoms often associated with , depression, or low self-esteem. Gaslighting is distinct from genuine relationship conflict in that one party manipulates the perceptions of the other.
In psychiatry and psychology
The word gaslighting is occasionally used in clinical literature, but is considered a colloquialism by the American Psychological Association. Barton and Whitehead described three of gaslighting with the goal of securing a person's involuntary commitment to a psychiatric hospital, motivated by a desire to get rid of relatives or obtain financial gain: a wife attempting to frame her husband as violent so she could elope with her lover, another wife alleging that her pub-owning husband was an alcoholic in order to leave him and take control of the pub, and a retirement home manager who gave laxatives to a resident before referring her to a psychiatric hospital for dementia and incontinence.
Motivations
Gaslighting is a way to control the moment, stop conflict, ease anxiety, and feel in control. It often deflects responsibility however and tears down the other person. Some may gaslight their partners by denying events, including personal violence. A study found that those who gaslight tended to score high on manipulative personality traits.
Learned behavior
Gaslighting is a learned trait. A gaslighter is a student of social learning. They witness it, experience it themselves, or stumble upon it, and see that it works, both for self-regulation and coregulation. Studies have shown that gaslighting is more prevalent in couples where one or both partners have maladaptive personality traits (such as traits associated with short-term mental illness like depression), substance-induced illness (e.g., alcoholism), mood disorders (e.g., bipolar disorder), anxiety disorders (e.g., PTSD), personality disorder (e.g., BPD, NPD, etc.), neurodevelopmental disorder (e.g., ADHD), or combination of the above ( i.e., co-occurrence) and are prone to and adept at convincing others to doubt their own perceptions.
Habilitation
It can be difficult to extricate oneself from a gaslighting power dynamic:
Broader use
In 2022, Merriam-Webster named "gaslighting" its Word of the Year due to the vast increase in channels and technologies used to mislead and the word becoming common for the perception of deception. The word is often used incorrectly to refer to conflicts and disagreements. According to Robin Stern, PhD, co-founder of the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence, "Gaslighting is often used in an accusatory way when somebody may just be insistent on something, or somebody may be trying to influence you. That's not what gaslighting is."
In medicine
Medical gaslighting is an informal term that refers to patients having their real symptoms dismissed or downplayed by medical professionals, leading to incorrect or delayed diagnoses; women are more likely to be affected by the phenomenon.
In politics
Gaslighting is more likely to be effective when the gaslighter has a position of power.
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